Communication
Scales of communication culture
Good faith vs Bad faith
Good faith |
Bad faith |
Humility and curiosity |
Hubris and lack of curiosity in opposing views |
Update position based on new information |
Refuse changes in position based on new information |
Disagreements welcomed; group learning valued |
Disagreements unwelcomed; consensus overstated |
Steelman the position of others |
Strawman the position of others |
Respectly disagree |
Disrespectfully disagree |
Sufficient time given to open discussion |
Insufficient time given to open discussion |
Use careful clarifications and evidence |
Avoid or omit careful clarifications and evidence |
Attempt to find shared base realities and values |
No attempt to find shared base realities and values |
Emergence of new positions, integrations, and nuance |
Emergence of stalemates, polarization, and simplifications |
Wait vs Interrupt
- Do not interrupt (vs) Interrupt when you understand
- Speak briefly (vs) Speak until I interrupt
- Use physical cues to indicate understanding and desire to speak (vs) Use physical cues to indicate when I should continue talking
ย |
I interrupt |
I wait for you to finish |
I let you interrupt |
The Church of Interruption |
The Meek |
I will say my piece no matter what |
Barkers |
The Church of Strong Civility |
Asynchronous first vs Synchronous first
- Do not expect an immediate response (vs) Expect an immediate response
- Respond on your own time (vs) Must be present to respond
- Respond when it works best for you (vs) Everyone is tied to the same schedule
Reveal vs Infer
- When you want something I trust you to ask for it (vs) When you want something I trust you will give me hints to notice and interpret.
- If I make a request that doesnโt make sense to you, I trust you to refuse it (vs) I trust you to notice my hints to what I want and provide or offer it if possible.
Explicit vs Implicit
- State what may be obvious, but is often not to everyone (vs) Holding back statement that seem obvious to you, but may not be obvious to everyone else
- Focus on reducing ambiguity (vs) Do not focus on reducing ambiguity